It is so easy to be overwhelmed by all that is wrong in the world. We are bombarded almost constantly by problems that are beyond our ability to fix…or even understand. I am convinced that it is not healthy. As a physician, I see patients suffer from extreme anxiety incongruous with their own life difficulties.  How does one stay calm and functional in this very messy world?

One  answer is to monitor what we expose ourselves to.   What do we read?   To what do we listen?  Where do we get our news?  News sources today have become entertainment. The goal is to keep us entranced, listening for the next detail just like a good piece of fiction. But it is not fiction! And we do not have the resources to handle the problems of the whole world. We are finite. Our resources…mental, emotional, spiritual and financial resources….are all finite. When we are constantly inundated by problems and tragedies that happen far away and cause us to grieve and worry as if we could do something about them but cannot, we put ourselves in a position to get sick.

So how do we stay informed without becoming overanxious?  We cannot avoid hearing what is going on around us, nor do we really want to.  We can, however, be a little more selective.  Some TV personalities are more dramatic and inflammatory than others.  Also, we  can choose to listen just once.  We don’t have to listen to several shows in a row, all repeating the same thing. It is amazing how you can learn most of what you get during several hours of TV coverage in a good 5 minute synopsis.

We can  select shows that give unbiased news without a lot of commentary.  We are smart enough to make our own conclusions, and often don’t realize how we are influenced by the opinions of people that we do not really know.  Do you really know Bill O’Riley or Anderson Cooper?  And when something wholesome or encouraging is reported,  we can email or write to show that we appreciate that!  For them, it is about ratings and keeping us happy and coming back for more.

It cannot be right to put our head in the sand or to pretend we don’t care!  We were designed by our creator to be relational.  But how far does our own sphere of influence extend?   Who in that sphere is doing well and who could use our help?  For most of us, our sphere of influence is not the whole world, no matter how influential we would like to think we are. It is not heartless to not want to hear about every imaginative crime in cities not our own. Wherever we live, our own city has enough. And we might be able to help in our own city. So perhaps we should save our energy  for that.

Our own mental health is also improved by  looking for the good that surrounds us. In the midst of this fallen world there is a tremendous amount that is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely and commendable. Let us look for what is excellent and worthy of praise and give it at least equal billing!  And if someone else does this on TV or radio or in print, then give kudos to them!

I recently made a visit to my hometown. Like lots of people, I have wonderful memories of growing up in the 60s and 70s in a prosperous community. Nancy Sinatra’s song “Downtown” rang true back then. Downtown was fun and where the action was before indoor malls. I remember a huge Montgomery Ward store with a large candy counter where my mom would buy a bag of mixed malted milk balls and chocolate stars. So I was excited to stroll those sidewalks again. But memory lane is not always such a beautiful street. The gorgeous stone church I attended is still there, but the steps I climbed so often to enter the sanctuary are gone and replaced by a wall. My elementary school lies vacant with weeds in front that are taller than the kids that used to attend. My high school also lies empty – someone painted the doors pink before it closed. The streets of small but well kept homes are in disrepair. The town has hit hard times. It depended on one industry and did not diversify. The town leaders did not foresee the future, so now my hometown lies in disarray.

Memory lane is a good place to visit and the past holds many lessons for today. But I can get stuck in the past. Rather than take the lessons it teaches and move forward, I tend to grow melancholy. Like the apostle Paul says, forgetting what lies behind one must press forward. I do not want to stumble now because I am not looking where I am going. I had a beautiful past and God promises a beautiful future eventually. But for now, I would not want to stumble on anything behind me! I shall concentrate on improving today and dream of what lies ahead.

I remember hearing once about a middle school student who wanted to be class president. She promised everyone free ice cream and won easily against a poorer student who had good ideas and a genuine interest in her classmates. Has the United States of America become like that middle school class?  Do we just want to elect those who promise us the most stuff and the easiest life……forgetting that We the People pay for it?

It would be nice to make a good living at a job that required little education, so maybe we should increase the minimum wage. Free college for everyone may be a solution….. even for kids who did not value the first 13 years of free education. Of course everyone should get free health care, including smokers, alcoholics and drug abusers. And if someone has a bad outcome, they should be able to sue the health care system, even if their care was rendered in good faith for a self-induced ailment. It all sounds nice, but it is not realistic.

We have such itchy ears. Do we really think our society can prosper this way? We are a society in denial. We listen to politicians when they blatantly tell untruths and then expect them to act in good faith the next time. We forget that if someone is dishonest in a small matter, they will be dishonest in a large one. They promise what they cannot give. We desperately need honest politicians to tell us what we would rather not hear.

We the people need to let our politicians know that character DOES matter. If they do not pay their own taxes, I don’t want them to vote on mine. If they cheat on their spouse they will cheat on me! What they do in their personal lives is no longer just their own business …… It determines whether I want them to be involved in mine!

I remember circling a parking lot with my husband at a health club. We were searching for a close parking spot. We wanted to go in and walk the track. We were trying to save a few steps on our way to walk! Definitely schizophrenic. Definitely American. And CRAZY!

So fast forward a few years and I bought a Fitbit. I LOVE my fitbit. It goes with me everywhere and it counts every step I take. The first thing it taught me is that I really did not take that many steps. But now I do more. When others are parking close to buildings, I purposefully park further away and enjoy the walk. I take the stairs. I make more trips to carry in the groceries (and don’t drop as much). Getting to 10,000 steps every day is not easy. It means avoiding escalators and elevators and moving sidewalks. It means taking a walk with a friend. Staying off the couch and enjoying outdoors.

Instead of taking shortcuts all day so I can get home in time to exercise, I incorporate it into my day. I encourage my patients to do the same. Why have we bought into the lie that the most efficient route is always best? It’s just not true! So why do I love my Fitbit? It has taught me that sometimes the best way is the long way around!

Today I went on a college tour.  As this was for my 4th and youngest child, I have lost count of how many college tours I have been on.  I realized something as I sat listening this morning – all of the “welcome to this  school” talks are almost identical.  All admission officers say the same things.  If  all you did was listen to that part of the tour, you could not tell where you were.  So for anyone embarking on a similar endeavor, I have listed a few questions you might want to ask yourself about a school your son or daughter is thinking about attending.

1.  If it is a small school, does the community support it?  Is it truly a college town?

2.  How many students continue to live on campus past the first year?

3.  What is dorm life like?

4.  How is the food?

5.  What percentage of students study abroad?

6. How many states or countries are represented in the student body?

7.  What percentage of students participate in Greek life?

8.  What clubs are on campus?  Intramural sports?

9.  Is there an honor system?

10.   Are classes taught by professors only or teaching assistants?

11.  Finally, google Successful “school of choice” graduates to see if there are any highly successful or famous graduates.  Schools will always say that their stats are great.  This morning they said that 97% of last year’s grads were employed, in grad school, or volunteering or doing other useful activities!  What does that mean?

 I remember  a science  project as a kid where I planted one ear of corn in my parent’s flower bed.       It did not fare well!  As a kid, I never watched things grow.  Already grown flowers and fruit and vegetables came from the store.  I probably was vaguely aware of seeds but the seeds to food drama occurred elsewhere. And drama it is!

I am older now and have a garden. It is so much fun! Who knew that if you plant carrots in dirt above red clay they turn 90 degrees and grow sideways? Definitely a rookie mistake! I did not know that a green pepper will mature into a red pepper with 11 times more beta-carotene and      1 1/2 times more vitamin C. And paprika is made from red peppers! Amazing! City dwellers lose out on so much! Everyone living with lots of traffic and tall buildings should have at least a small herb garden in a window or on a balcony….just for the pleasure of watching something grow!

Last night I had a dream that I met the President. I was standing in a long line. Somehow I lost one of my shoes (very high heels …a very unrealistic dream). I felt it would be extremely rude to meet the President with only one shoe, so I frantically hunted and found it! They let me back in line. My turn came to shake the President’s hand and he liked me! Enough that he asked me if I would like to meet Michelle. Yes!! (Even in my dream I was excited) He called over a secret service agent and I was taken to meet Michelle Obama. And she liked me too! Enough that she asked me if there was any room in the White House I would like to see. Would I!! The Lincoln bedroom. So there we went. (It gets even better). Mrs Obama had been in there earlier reading a book and it was lying on the table. I was staring at it and she asked me if I knew about it. I did! I had written it (again, a very unrealistic dream). She wanted me to autograph it….and then there were other questions. Where was I from? Small town in South Carolina. Gaffney. You know…the Peach water tower in House of Cards. And then…what was the pulse of the nation? How would I know? I live in Gaffney. I told her that with the recent response of Mother Emmanuel church to the Charleston shooting, there was a renewed sense of hope and the grace of God. But also, with the recent Supreme Court hearing on gay marriage………..I woke up, but kept thinking about what I would say.

 
What do people feel with this last ruling? Some are happy. Some don’t care much. But those who are looking down the road, I think, feel a sense of dread. More is coming. It isn’t just about freedom to love who you choose. It never was. The rhetoric has been manipulated. Especially when it is called a civil rights issue. Why are those who fought so hard in the real civIl rights movement not offended? Martin Luther King was fighting to be seen by his fellow men as God saw him. We are all one race. The Bible is clear on that. The Bible is clear that we are to love everyone. The bible is also clear that there are actions that God does not sanction. One is sexual relations between those of the same sex. This ruling is not about loving whomever you choose. It is about the state condoning an action not condoned by God. It is just the opposite of the real civil rights movement.

So, in my dream, I was not able to finish discussing the current state of our nation. I am left to wonder how the dream would have ended if I had remained asleep. Dreams while asleep are often foggy things anyway. The dream that Martin Luther King had was a different sort of dream, and I am vary glad it is being realized more and more in this great land. There are dreams and aspirations of some groups, however, that I feel do not bode well for the state of our nation.

The recent tragedy in Charleston has touched the heart of this nation. So has the response of the church. President Barack Obama called it “an expression of faith that is unimaginable but that reflects the goodness of the American people.” It reflects the goodness of a people who live close to and serve a good God. It is not something anyone could do on their own strength. That is why the world will never understand it. What a witness! They will see, like Joseph in the Old Testament, how something the devil means for evil can bring about good. I am amazed and heartened and encouraged at their strength. We must all pray for these people. Pray that the God they serve will bring revival to our hearts.

To the people of Emmanuel African Methodist Church…I am saddened for your loss, but you and those who died are giving our nation a great gift. Thank you. Thank you for showing us the grace of God.

A patient recently told be that “nobody trusts anybody anymore.” I am inclined to agree with that to a point. Perhaps that is the reason that so many of us are being tracked. Let me explain…I am not talking about the tracking that goes on when you purchase something or look something up on the internet. That is another problem altogether. I am concerned about the tracking of so many professionals as they try to do their job. Tracking teachers. Tracking UPS drivers. Tracking physicians. That last one I know a lot about. Everyone is tracking us. Drug reps know if we prescribe their drugs. Insurance companies know how many and what kind of tests we order. (Some we don’t order because they don’t let us) Hospitals know how many of our patients are admitted. Our electronic medical records can tell how many diabetic patients we have and what their sugar runs. They cannot yet tell you how well these same patients follow directions, but that will come soon… they are tracking patients also. And calling their homes. All because they care, of course.

All of this tracking is to improve things. Perhaps there is someone somewhere who does a better job because of it? I doubt it! Mostly, it just discourages those of us who really do care and are really trying to do a good job!

A good walk can change your mood! The smell of honeysuckle. The melody of birds, especially in the early morning which is my favorite time to stride. There is something about the beauty of nature that enlarges and calms one’s thoughts. I often find myself thanking God for the gorgeous side of life. I love the vast expanses of green below and blue above. Why do people want to move away from this? I have lived in a large city before but now I reside outside a small town in a rural area. In a big city you don’t miss this scenery as much as you just forget about it. You get used to cement and blocked skies. It can be exciting and I will take a large city for a weekend of fun. But for day in and day out living, I think I prefer more space. I know it is true that tall buildings can inspire…………………. but for me, I am inspired by green and blue!